Hi all -
Well, it's been a month since I last posted, and it's been an eventful month for us.
After lots of thought, prayer, tears, and more prayer, we have decided not to move forward with our Kazakhstan adoption plans. We met with our agency on Friday to withdraw from the program.
This has been a tough decision for us.
Our paperwork has been at the Ministry of Education since October 1st of last year. We requested a child of either gender, under 18 months of age. This is a pretty typical request. But for some reason, our paperwork just has not progressed out of the MOE. Our agency has requested information about our dossier, and they are simply told "There's nothing wrong with the paperwork." That's the only info they've been able to get. Meanwhile, many families from our agency that are technically "behind us" in line have gone ahead of us. As I stressed in my previous post, we are ecstatic for those families who are traveling... but when this happens repeatedly, month after month, we're left with the impression that something's not quite right.
Also, because Russell is starting a new job in August (a teaching position), he has no opportunities for leave time until next summer. There's no paternal leave, and he doesn't qualify for FMLA. So even if we got an invitation to Kazakhstan, we'd have to decline it.
I have to stress that the staff at Children's Hope have been nothing but supportive, kind, diligent, and empathetic during this process. We have felt so blessed to be working with them and we'll miss them tremendously.
For those of you with CHI who are still waiting on a Kazakh adoption, you are in my thoughts. I used to obsessively read blogs written by those who were ahead of us in line, and when something wouldn't go right for them, I'd get really worried - both for those families and for us. Please, please, please... don't let our experience and our decision shake your confidence and your faith in your path to adoption. If your child is waiting in Kazakhstan, then nothing can stand in the way of your getting there!
All of you who are traveling or about to travel - I am thrilled beyond words for you and can't wait to follow along with your journey.
We haven't totally given up on our quest to be parents. We're not entirely sure what the next step is. We might do some more research on domestic adoption. For now, we're just going to spend some time enjoying each other's company and not worrying about the phone ringing (or not ringing) with adoption news.
Thanks so much to all of my new blog friends and to all my friends and family who've supported us...
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24 comments:
Chrissy & Russell,
My thoughts and prayers are with you both at this time. I hope that you have peace in all of the decisions that you have to make, and always remember that everything happens for a reason- though sometimes it is unclear what exactly it is.
Wishing you both only the best!
Chrissy and Russell, We are thinking of you and sending prayers your way. We believe you have to follow your heart. We wish you the best.
Stephanie and Dusty Baker
Darn...I am so bummed for you both. I agree your wait was ridiculously long and inhuman. I doubt I could have lasted as long as you both have. I wish there was some way to have helped you guys or some way to make you feel better. Shedding a tear for you in Illinois.
Chrissy & Russell,
Our thoughts and prayers are with you at this difficult time!
Best wishes...I'll miss reading about your goats...my prayers are with you as you explore other avenues.
Jane
Your heart must be breaking! This is so sad. I just don't understand how you could be constantly skipped. My thoughts & prayers are with you. I will miss hearing about the goats!!!
Good Luck!
Chrissy and Russell, I have been checking on you and wondering why you've been so quiet. My thoughts and prayers are with you too.
It is a tough decision, but one that I can understand you making because the waiting and not knowing is very frustrating.
I started looking into domestic adoption too ( due to rumors on Joe's age, etc) and found it to be very promising.
You are such great people and I know that taking some time off will give you both some energy and time to recharge and think about your next steps.
There are so many options out there, just confusing to choose which one is the right one.
Thinking of you guys,
Susan
Chrissy and Russell -
The Kaz adoption process has been a puzzling one from the day we started it. I am so sad that you are stepping out, though I understand your decision and support your reasons. I wish you the very best as you begin a new chapter!!
Sara
Chrissy & Russell,
I'm so sorry to hear this news, so sorry that things have come to this.
I think your decision makes plenty of sense, though.
I wish you all the best as you take a break from being "in process" and begin to consider the alternatives.
All the best,
Susan B-T
Wishing you only the happiness you desire wherever this road leads you.
Darlene
This must have been a very difficult decision to make. We are wishing you the best in your future.
Chrissy and Russell,
You are both in our prayers during this time. Its a very tough decision. Many good vibes are being sent your way.
~Allison
So sorry that you had to make such a difficult decision. I will be thinking of you.
Suzette
Chrissy and Russell,
I am so sorry to hear that you had to make this difficult decision. I have some info to share with you about domestic adoption. If you would like it please email me at shaufreiberg@gmail.com. You will both be in my thoughts.
Shauna
I'm so sorry you guys have had to make this decision - our thoughts and prayers are with you as you take this time to regroup and look at your next steps. Follow your hearts - they will not lead you astray. We wish you blessings & the best always.
I am very sad to hear your news--it must have been sohard to make that decision. I wish you peace and better things to come in your future. Blessings, Mary
Wow that must've been a tough one and my heart goes out to you. I don't understand why your wait was so long--only that you were meant to take a different path. Hoping the new path leads you directly to your child.
You're in my thoughts and prayers.
Karen
I am so sorry that it did not work out for you guys in Kaz. Your heart is telling you what to do and I am sure that your child will come to you in another way. Please keep in touch! Lisa
Your name was passed to me from several clients. We are so sorry that you have had issues and would like to offer our condolences and support. If there is anything that we may be able to help you with, please do not hesitate to call or write. Colene from Journey Home Adoption
Hey guys,
Sorry to hear about this. What a hard decision. We re thinking of you as always and are here if you need anything! ((HUGS)))
Chrissy and Russell, we are so sorry to have not responded sooner, as we are behind in our blog reading. We just want you to know that we are thinking of you. We hope that your next steps are clear to you soon, and that it will someday become clear why your journey to Kaz was not meant to be. You will continue to be in our thoughts for days and months to come.
Karen & Glenn.
My prayers are with you. Have you considered a waiting child in China with special needs? Only one parent needs to travel. I highly recommend Heritage Adoption Services.
Laura
dd Katie, 5, KZ
dd Sarah, 3, China, cl/p
Thanks so much for the kind words--I know you understand after making your decision. I haven't entirely decided what comes next but am researching. Researching the second time around isn't quite as fun but because of my age, I don't feel like I have very much time to waste. I really appreciate the support--meeting other's through the blogs has been the best part of this process. I have already gotten a lot of help from other bloggers.
Just checking in to see how you're doing and to let you know I'm thinking of you.
Karen
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